Sunday, 06/09/2002 Entry: "I just saw "Being John Malkovich""

Still, one has to wonder about the implications of taking on a persona who looks and sounds like a living actor. I've never run into it before, and before I knew the finer nuances of Yahoo Messenger's privacy settings, I got a lot of people asking me whether I was Robert Picardo. Like the man has nothing better to do than sit at home on his free days and play the Doctor online. Forget the kids, convention appearances, career commitments...

Besides, Picardo didn't have to be online to do that. Reports started coming in from conventiongoers shortly after series shooting wrapped for Star Trek Voyager last year that he'd occasionally lapse into character while accommodating fans with autographs. I'm relieved for him that he had a family wtih which to share his separation anxiety phase, but also I wonder inwardly whether he scared them with this identity adjustment?

In a way, I can understand. When it hit me that the series was ending, I realized that one of my all-time favorite fictional characters, whose life would have truly just begun should the crew make it back to Federation Space. It couldn't be just goodbye after seeing him develop into a fully realized individual after seven years of meticulous evolving. So that's why I started a website and accepted that first invitation to Simming. I want to keep the Doctor alive and living. And after an abysmal final year where the writers and producers didn't give a shit about continuity and characters, more than ever I felt the calling to fill a void. (I think after Picardo's somewhat distorted recollections and multitude of embarrassing technological faux pas galore in The Hologram's Handbook, I feel the call louder than ever. But I've already brought that up in the Exploding Chicken. Still: how can anybody write about how a program works when they don't know the first thing about what a program even is? The answer of course is the same as always: "It's not WHAT you know...")

So essentially this started as a personal quest to keep the Doctor going. It's a high compliment when people tell me that when they read my parts in a role play story, they hear the Doctor's voice. We're kindred spirits the Doc and I.

I'm not a kindred spirit with Picardo. He's a talented and clever actor (except when he writes about computer programs). We just have a common interest in preserving a very special character. The man worked real hard to bring life into that blank slate of a role, and input many quirks to the creative staff. He also contributed the plot for what became a classic episode, making him the only Trek actor to get a story credit. I'm sure he didn't intend to throw everything he did those seven years out the window with a book of gaffs. I'll bet he's got a phobia for computers or something. I mean, anyone who watched the Star Trek edition of The Weakest Link last year knows full well what caused him to lose the game to Le Var Burton.

Don't we?

Getting back to the entry title: No, I wouldn't want to be Robert Picardo. I know the difference between the actor and character, and I know the difference between myself and the character.

This is me.